Authenticity instead of performance

authenticity instead of performance

Authenticity is more powerful than performance

Most of us spend our lives feeling we have to be something for ourselves or others. We feel we have to perform no matter what arena of life we are in. Authenticity is more powerful than performance. Authenticity is about honoring who we really are in that moment. We can never move others more, or do a better job than if we are centered in this moment. Allowing our deepest being to express itself. Sometimes doing that may look like success , sometimes it may feel like failure. However expressing ourselves truly is never failure, it is just beautiful truth.

 Being authentic in meetings

If we are in an  important meeting and we are feeling we have to perform, we are being what others want us to be. To a degree this may be necessary. However we are not offering our full value. Performance is not as powerful as authenticity. If we tune in to our inner being,  and express the content in a manner that feels most authentically ourselves, it’s always more valuable. There is a kind of rawness and openness that comes naturally when we let go of performance. 

Letting go of sport performance and allowing presence

When you are a member of a cricket team (or any team) and you haven’t been making many runs. Then the coach suggests you may be out unless you perform this game. Aim to have some acceptance for either possibility, staying in or not staying in. Trust that either outcome will have some value for you. Then you will put yourself under less pressure. Just go out and be who you are, play the way that is most comfortable for you. Be present and focused on each ball, one at a time, letting your body do what it’s good at. Let go of overall performance and just do what comes in each moment. This is what being a mindful being is all about.

Being authentic at work

If you are a school teacher and the principle or the curriculum tells you certain things have to be performed a certain way. However, you have a deeper sense of variations that are better for your students. Trust your gut instinct, be present with your beautiful students and let your deeper intuitive self guide what you do. Of course there will be constraints, that’s OK, work with them not against them. It will possibly feel scary to trust yourself initially and to risk what others may say. That’s OK feel the fear and do it anyway.

Being authentic in our social life

Always being most true to ourselves will be the best way to be, even if who we are in that moment is underconfident. Socially we often feel the need to perform , to be bubbly or the life of the party. We don’t need to be any of those things. We are not available to ourselves and others, if we are busy trying to be something. However when we are authentic we are very available.
If we feel underconfident socially. It’s helpful to practice deep slow exhalations,  then really internally accept our fear. This settles us, then just aim to stay warm and open, rather than withdrawing. As long as we stay warm and open, even if we are quiet, others will like us. Over time there will be increasing ability to say what comes from our heart.

Truth and vulnerability, not performance

I read a beautiful article in Saturdays West a few weeks ago about a radio show hostess who was experiencing some depression. She had the courage to express truly what she was feeling, live on radio with no previous discussion to her bosses nor co hosts. She let go of all performance in that moment and was simply herself allowing openness and vulnerability. Nothing is ever more powerful than the authentic expression of who we are, it was hugely well received by her audience.

We don’t realize we are performing most of the time

For most of us performance starts the minute we are faced with another human. Many of us are even performing to ourselves. Sometimes it takes a lot of slowing down and tuning in before we can see the truth of that. It can be very hard to acknowledge our own need for approval, our fears or our feelings of inadequacy. Unfortunately we will never move beyond what we don’t acknowledge. Staying in the “I’m OK” performance, lying to ourselves, will never get us anywhere.

We doubt that our authentic expression is beautiful

There are many circumstances where some degree of performance is necessary. Of course this is perfectly OK, we need to function in the world. However it’s so valuable to be aware of the degree we perform and our loss of authenticity. So many humans feel that their authentic Self is boring or has nothing to offer. This is so untrue. Your authenticity is the most beautiful expression you have.
Your authenticity will nurture you, whereas performance will drain you. Mia

Presence is the way out of performance.

Spend more time tuning in to your inner being. Acknowledge what is there with acceptance, whether it is turbulent or still. Aim to maintain some contact with your inner being, such as your breath, when you are with people. Be willing to be open and vulnerable when possible. It always feels scary to be vulnerable and undefended. However, that is the only way to allow love and consciousness to flow in your life. Aim to gently let go of performance and you will be on your way to a more authentic, present and joyous life.

Read more qualities that enlighten

Scroll to Top